A new job, redundancy, a move, a relationship ending, a business changing direction: change brings uncertainty, and uncertainty triggers the same threat response as danger. Feeling anxious, irritable or flat during change is a normal response, not a sign that you are coping badly.
People move through change at different speeds. Knowing where you are, and what is within your reach, makes it easier to steady yourself.
01
Where are you on the curve?
Stage 1
Shock and denial
What it can feel like: Disbelief, carrying on as before, lots of questions.
What helps: Clear information, and time to take it in.
Stage 2
Anger and frustration
What it can feel like: Irritability, unfairness, low motivation, fear of loss.
What helps: Somewhere to voice it. Focus on what you can control.
Stage 3
Acceptance and integration
What it can feel like: Exploring the new, more energy, some possibilities.
What helps: Small early wins, and recognising how far you have come.
02
Control, influence, accept
List your concerns, then sort them.
| I can control | I can influence | I need to accept, for now |
|---|---|---|
Exercise
What I need
A question I want answered, and who I will ask:
One thing within my control I will do this week: